Alpha.

Here I am, at the rudimentary stages of life. 20 in 4 months or so. A fifth of my life gone, and I am no closer to the answer I seek than I was 20 years ago. I kept asking myself, why pursue the great unknown when I can sit back, get a medical degree and live a life of ignorance? To relish the life of one with financial security and be respected by a narrow circle of organic matter.

Helping others, consoling the sick and tending to the wounded, aren't they all just mere manifestations of humanity? Acts that pull us together as one, acts that are essential to the continuation of humankind. Despite the fact that selflessness is a virtue, I don't see the necessity for me to mingle with the commons. Call me selfish, call me whatever names you want to but I stand unwavered by my choice to pursue the Truth, the Answer or whatever I'm seeking. It gives me purpose, a sense of direction.

Speaking of which. What am I looking for? After reading the book by Stephan Hawking and taking an interest in Physics and the String Theory, I am fascinated by the idea that this plane of existance we live in may have more than 4 dimensions. It sounds plausible too. We can only hear, feel, taste and see how matter interact with space in terms of widths, breadths, heights and time.

The Universe we live in is astounding. One day, when I'm well equipped with the knowledge I require, I'l harness it's most remote secrets and bring them to light. There must be a bigger picture of what the Universe is. Something grander, something infinitely preplexing and unbelievable. Something mere humans can't even begin to speculate.

For now, I'm stuck in a precarious balancing act between my studies and the cyber world. Hopefully- no wait. I must and will prevail. 2010 here I come!